I know you are but what am I?

For people of a certain age, this phrase just rolls off the tongue. Pee Wee Herman was a major entertainer for about fifteen minutes in the 1980s and then Paul Reubens had his issues. He faded into obscurity. History is riddled with one hit wonders and those that kept us entertained for a short while. However, the phrase seems to be the 2020 version of “it’s the economy stupid.”

I can’t say I’ve worked in a campaign before, but I’ve paid attention to enough campaigns to know that one of the keys is staying on message. You find a message that resonates and you repeat it as often as you can. That really isn’t a secret. I’d have to imagine that working in the Trump campaign creates more headaches than most, but he is able to keep this message going.

Trump is a racist. Full stop. So, how do we counteract that? Well, we could talk about black unemployment being low (before COVID) and a whopping eight percent of African Americans backing Trump. That’s more than Mitt Romney got you know. Somehow though, that punch hasn’t landed. So, let’s keep fishing.

Well, he did have Kanye West and Kim at the White House. They argued for criminal justice reform. Congress passed something about that right? Yet, all of the distractions in the world can’t distract you from a lifetime of racist comments and actions. Remember, there were good people on both sides in Charlottesville. We can’t rename military bases or tear down statues. NASCAR should allow the Confederate Flag to fly. Those black athletes that kneel during the national anthem are thugs. Need I go on?

So, the best approach is not to fight it anymore. You just make your opponent look racist too. Yeah, I said all of that stuff and most of it this year, but did you see what Joe Biden said back in 1977? Take one quote out of context and anything can happen. Who knows what Biden meant back then. Who knows whether he still believes any of that. 43 years is literally a lifetime ago. The intended affect is that we now believe both are racist so they cancel each other out.

Wait, isn’t Trump a sexist pig that has been married three times, had sex and paid off porn stars, and been accused by over 20 women of sexual assault? Sure, but all of those 20+ women are lying dogs that I never would have touched in a million years. Wait, I did say I could grab them by the crotch and they’d love it. Oh well, I guess I can’t take that one back.

So, let’s look at Creepy Joe. He touches women and girls in creepy ways. He hugs a lot. One of his former employees charged him with sexual harassment and then changed her mind and called it rape. No one could collaborate either the harassment or rape and no one could find evidence of the complaint at the time. Still, an accustation is an accusation and all accusations should be taken seriously.

Yet, when you are on the right and you are screaming about giving Joe’s accuser a full opportunity to speak her piece isn’t a little odd that we gloss over the 20+ women that have accused your own guy? So, what’s the hope here? Again, we are hoping that they cancel each other out.

Wharton Business school or no, Trump isn’t the sharpest knife in the drawer. You don’t file for bankruptcy that many times for nothing. He lost his shirt running casinos. Let that sink in for a moment. We’ve heard the gaffes. The “1917 flu epidemic” (I still wonder how no one has whispered 1918 into his ear) somehow caused the end of World War II. Frederick Douglass might get a spot in his cabinet if he has a second term. Fabulosa might be working on a way to inject their product to attack the virus. I could go on and on.

We’ve seen him fumble through interviews, press conferences, and tweets. He even self-owned himself just this week when he blasted Michelle Obama for being 20,000 deaths short in her speech. It was reminiscent of the time in 2016 when he bragged about paying no taxes. Needless to say, no one can argue he is a very stable genius with a straight face. Everyone has gaffes, but this a guy that bragged about acing a mental competency test.

So, it’s become Sleepy Joe. Friends on the right laugh at Biden for his gaffes and question his mental competency without feeling the tinge of irony that must be rattling around somewhere in their brain. Again, the best they can hope for is that they somehow cancel each other out. You have a village idiot that apparently doesn’t read, is ignorant of history, and doesn’t seem to know how government works telling you that someone that has served over 40 years in government is no longer mentally competent to hold the office. I’m willing to concede that Biden has probably lost some off of his fastball, but comparing the two is like comparing an aging big league pitcher to Wedge Fickus on your beer league softball team.

The most depressing part of this deal is that people aren’t capable of adding all of this up. You have a guy who is definitely racist, definitely sexist, has the morals of a drunken sailor on shore leave, and the mental capacity of your drunken uncle that you tell your children not to listen to too closely. In order to pull this off, you will have to convince voters that Biden is just as racist, just as sexist, and is practically drooling all at the same time. Even if you believe all of that you have to ignore that Trump is a bully that doesn’t appear to care about anyone except for himself.

You can play this shell game for only so long. Even I believe everything you say about Joe Biden, you are asking me to ignore the fact that your guy has exactly zero redeeming qualities. That is unless I am also a racist, sexist, and someone that doesn’t care about anyone but myself. I refuse to believe there are that many racists, sexists, and narcissists in the world.

Author: sbarzilla

I have written three books about baseball including The Hall of Fame Index. I also write for thefantatasyfix.com. You can follow me on twitter @sbarzilla.

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