“Toys in the attic, I am crazy
Truly gone fishing
They must have taken my marbles away
Crazy, toys in the attic he is crazy.” — Roger Waters
Okay, I have a confession to make. This probably makes me a bad Democrat and a bad progressive, but I need to get it off my chest. I have never voted for Hunter Biden. What’s more, I will never vote for Hunter Biden no matter what he’s running for. It’s a character thing for me. Maybe that makes me a hypocrite. After all, George W. Bush was a recovering alcoholic and alleged drug addict and millions voted for him. Of course, I wasn’t one of those but I have to admit that I saw him differently. He was clearly in recovery and had been for decades. We can’t be too sure about Hunter Biden.
What’s more, I am willing to acknowledge that he has gotten multiple opportunities in life that 99 percent of people in other walks of life would never get. He has made more money and put in more positions of prestige than anyone deserves. Maybe he should have served some jail time for his drug habit. Of course, I have never really been big on dolling out jail sentences for addicts, but I suppose fair minded people can differ on that point. Simply put, he will never get my vote.
The funny thing is that he has never been on a ballot. He has never held any position within any presidential administration in the United States. He is currently a private citizen and is likely to remain that for the rest of his natural life. If he’s committed a crime then he deserves to go to jail. I don’t know that the current president has ever said differently, but maybe he has and I’m just not aware of it. Maybe he has the location of Jimmy Hoffa, the real story behind the JFK assassination, and the location of aliens on his laptop, but I tend to doubt it. Maybe that laptop holds the key to inflation, the price of gas, and the secrets to solving the conflict between Russia and Ukraine. Maybe it’s just a damn laptop.
Somehow, Hunter, his drug problem, and his laptop didn’t make it on Twitter in the summer of 2020. Apparently, there were tweets about this that were taken down or not published for some nefarious reason. Somehow this “scandal” amounts to an affront to free speech and the kind of cheating that means the 2020 election was stolen. Yet, and I’m just spitballing here, no one that was undecided at the time gave a hoot about his laptop. Maybe no one that was undecided gave a crap about Hunter Biden. Maybe it was because Hunter Biden wasn’t on the ballot, but again I’m just spitballing. Maybe it was because they still haven’t proven a damn thing about why I should care. Maybe it was because we looked at the two candidates and decided that no matter what had happened with Joe Biden’s only surviving son, he couldn’t be worse than the worst president in the history of the nation. Of course, I’m just spitballing here.